i started recording my new cd recording in January 2013. I dedicated at least 5 months full day job to produce it. one moth ago I had finally all tracks one after another, as they were going to be in the cd, all of them prepared for mastering. I listened to the music for the first time out of the studio, in my bike with the headphones. the result was katastrophal. I decided to cancel everything. I won’t release this shit. only 3 or 4 pieces will remain from the original 15. so now I am redefining all my approach to music and composition. I have to find a new sound, this fake classical semi-virtuous loop thing I have been doing ’till now is simply dead. it hurts, but I must continue ahead, I am afraid there might not be something else than what I did, but I must take the risk and give it a try, my next concert in france will be a good opportunity for it. hopefully I have still some money left, and I can focus and spend 10 hours day playing and experimenting.
something inside of me (hope) tells me I will succeed in this struggle, but something outside (despair) shows me I won’t, that I will end up my days working in pizza delivering.